I lost a friend this year. Vicky was here one minute and gone the next. I check her Facebook page regularly, sometimes hoping to see a new funny status update, but always finding messages of love and beauty. So many lives touched by one person. I write on her wall now and then. I miss her and her infectious humour. The world won't be the same without her in it.
Last week would've been my aunts 50th birthday. I was at work and held myself together all day, but on my drive home I turned into a blubbering wreck. I laughed and cried and sobbed. Remembering that awful day when I got that phone call. It resounds in my head. I remembered the funny times, like going to see Bridget Jones Diary with my mum and her and the two of them behaving like school girls, giggling the whole way through because Mikki offered my mum a sandwich, which my mother gladly took as she was hungry, only there were two sandwiches squashed together and my mum ate all of them leaving none for Mikki. The two of them were in stitches through the entire film. But throughout all the funny incidents I kept feeling like I was losing her all over again. She should have been here to celebrate her 50th. My heart has been weighed down with such sadness this year.
On a lighter note, this year marks Molly's second Christmas and I find myself getting more excited as it approaches. She is more aware of what is going on around her and I can't wait to see her reaction to Santa when she has her photo taken this year hahaha!
My cousin sat her HSC this year and turned 18. I remember the day she was born, which feels like only yesterday. I wish Mikki was here to see her baby girl become a woman.
My Gran has been in and out of hospital this year, which makes me feel a little unsettled. I know that she is old and that the inevitable will happen one day, but I wish that I could somehow make her live forever. I wish that I could relieve her of all the pain she suffers with her arthritis and osteo. The best can do is take Molly to see her and my grandfather. Molly always seems to lift their spirits,you can her the smiles in my grandparents voices after a visit with Moz.
I'm so grateful that I have such a wonderful and close family. I'm grateful that Molly is able to spend time with her great grandparents as well as one set of her grand parents. I wish that we could visit my husbands family in Wales. Molly would have the time of her life, but finances are always a bugger, and the cost of flights is ridiculous. So we resort to Skype and Facebook. Nevertheless, I am grateful for all the family we have.So this year has had its ups and downs. The downs certainly floored me, but the ups grabbed me and hauled me right back up. Christmas here I come!
